Category Archives: Life

In The Mood

To be honest the title isn’t really appropriate, since I’m not in the mood for anything. I’m actually in a mood.

I know that at times I got through bouts of depression. And right now I’m going through one of those episodes. I have never been able to afford going to see someone about them. Often I will self treat myself. One thing I have been able to avoid is self-medication. I’m not one to take a bottle of booze off the the self and drink myself in to a drunken stupor. Although I have seen people do that.

Usually for me I will just crawl up into a ball. Well that’s more of a metaphor, since I don’t actually crawl up into a ball. What I will usually do is just sit in my comfy chair and stay inside. Somethings I will just mope. Other times I will sit in front of the TV and binge watch. Although the binge watching may be a channel and not a show.

I usually know when I get into a mood. Most of the times I have no idea what put me into it, nor what I can do to get out of them. I guess one bright spot is that I do acknowledge that I am in one. That sure wasn’t always the case.

I’m sitting here writing this and in a way, I am feeling better. Which is a good thing, I suppose. But I still feel like shutting out the world and just hide from it.

Is it the weather? The time of the month? Just my life in general? These are always questions I have and I never do seem to come up with an answer.

But for me, I’m going to put this away. Turn on the TV and get lost for awhile. It’s usually not too long.

Please follow and like us:

An Adventure

Yesterday morning I woke up with nothing to do and just a little bit bored. Sure I could have done some gardening, but I’m not really a gardener. This year it’s mostly just a bunch of weeds. OK, that’s not much different than most years, so what else is new.

The day was a bit cooler than the past few. Still hot in the sun, but not as humid. So I could have just laid out to get my all-over tan. Here’s something I don’t think I’ve said about me yet. I hate clothes. Even in the winter, so I don’t wear them. Well that’s not totally true, you can’t go through life no wearing clothes. If I have too wear something it’s usually a nice sundress.

Anyway, I decided to take a ride. I threw on my favorite sundress, blue with flowers. Part of my wanna-be flower child image I suppose. I crawled into my 20 year old Plymouth Breeze and hit the road. With no destination in mind.

Shortly after I grabbed a coffee at the local RoFo, I decided to go to Chesapeake City. Chesapeake City is a small town on the C&D Canal. There are some wonderful shops to browse through. There’s a nice little garden park next to the canal where you can sit, watch the boats and get lost in your thoughts and time.

But I didn’t get to Chesapeake City. On my way up MD 213 I came to the red light in Galena. The local fire department had cute fire fighters at each intersection. It was a fundraiser for the company itself. I call a young man over and stuck a 10 dollar bill in his boot.

A little further into town I saw what appeared to be a little festival going on. I decided to stop and discovered they were doing a pop-up open air market. What a cool idea. I spent a few hours there. I had a hot dog and fries by the Lions. I have to say they cooked some of the best fries.

Walked around the nice little town that I have driven through many times, but never found a reason to stop. There are a couple of neat antique shops and talked with a lot of friendly people. And to think if they didn’t have the little open air pop-market I wouldn’t have stopped. I am certainly going to go back soon.

Here are a few photos from the outing in Galena:

Please follow and like us:

Back to Normal

I’m hoping that life now can get back to normal after the long Independence Day Weekend. Well at least as normal as it can be. There will still be many of those ‘welcomed’ tourist here. Some though are here most of the summer and those we can take, with a grain of salt, of course.

‘Grain of Salt’? It’s an old saying that I have heard all my life. One that in a way makes sense, but also in a way it doesn’t. Wonder where it comes from? Hold on, Let me google it.

Back! Google it? What did we do before we had google to look up all the questions of life? Many times I suppose we just let it go. If really needed to know we went to the library to find out. However, usually on the way to the library, we would find a friend to hang out with with no thoughts on why we were heading to the library in the first place. That is until we got home without the answer we seeked.

Anyway, where did ‘Grain of Salt’ originate? You may have also just googled it so those of you who couldn’t wait already know. It is thought to come from Pliny the Elder’s Naturalis Historia, writing of a recipe for an antidote to a poison that had a grain of salt as the final ingredient.

I”m not sure that I know any more about the saying that I did before I searched. It seems to me that heading out to the library, meeting up with some friends on the way, and having a good time with them is much more interesting than switching to another window and doing a search.

Which gives me an idea. I’m going to give a friend a call, and see if we can search for that grain of salt missing from a Margaretta.


Please follow and like us:

A Hiccup of Sorts

When I decided to begin this writing adventure, telling my story as I move nearer to the age of 60 and that cross-over, I thought I would be more active. At least a couple of times a week and not skipping ahead more than a week.

It’s not that I really did anything to keep me away. Well, I did decide to take a trip to visit friends near the Ocean. I’m not one to need a lot of things when on vacation. I just grabbed a couple of sundresses, then again I rarely wear anything else, some drinks, reading material (books, I hate ebooks), and some snacks. Fortunately my friend’s pool is hidden from view and can swim in the nude, so I didn’t take a swimsuit.

One nice thing about living on MD Eastern Shore is that you live where people want to vacation. The worst part is that people want to vacation here.

Once summer arrives, especially the 4th of July weekend, one doesn’t really venture too far from home. Especially beginning Thursday evening until Monday night. That’s one of the reason I went to visit my friends in the middle of the last week in June.

We had a good time. The weather was perfect for nice days at the pool side. I did get a bit red, since I haven’t spent a lot of time out in the sun this year. I nights were clear and not too many bugs. I was surprised by that.

Now I’m home watching everyone zooming by in a rush, off to wherever they may be going. I’m perfectly happy to just stay home.

Even for the 4th, I’m staying home. Might break my diet and eat a steak. A girl got to enjoy life once in a while. I’m close enough to see some fireworks from my backyard. Good since I really don’t enjoy crowds.

Please follow and like us:

I had a Weird Dream Last Night

Looking back on last night, I wish that having a weird dream did happen. What actually occurred was that as I was settling in to get some sleep an old relationship came to mind. And it was there all night.

Without getting into too much detail, just after I came back to live on the shore and before my days and night were spent being a caregiver, I started a relationship with a man. He was unhappily married. There were reasons for him not leaving the relationship that had turned more into living as roommates than a married couple. Something I understood and accepted.

We enjoyed many hours together. Our love for each other was exchanged. I really do believe he loved me. Maybe he still does. And in a certain way I loved him too. But I decided that things were getting too serious and ended the relationship. In a way it was the hardest decision I ever made. I loved our time together and the sex was quite satisfying.

Many thoughts came to mind last night. From the day we met to the day, it was around this time of the year. Until I told him that we should just be friends and not lovers. Remembering the good times and the sex. Wondering if even after calling it off things would have been different if I had more free time. We talked about getting together as friends, but our schedules never seemed to come together. As I thought back on it, I’m thinking it may have been me not wanting the schedule to mesh.

The thoughts kept the sleep away. Finally around 3am I napped for a bit before the sun came out to say ‘Hello Summer’.

I haven’t seen him for a couple of months. Part of me wants to see him again. Another part says let it go. Even as I write this I don’t know what to do. I’ll probably do nothing other than think about him from time to time.

Please follow and like us: